I feel like it's been a while since I've really railed and raged. Stand back, peeps, because I am pissed...
I think in our collective election hangover you on the right can still keep reading ( yes, I'm talking to you Kid), we cried and cheered and celebrated but as it turns out, the world around us did not fall off its axis. I think in our yada yada woohoo big whoop good times wow kind of thinking, we missed the big picture. Ours is in fact not a New America.
Take California. Take Florida. For god sakes, will somebody take Arkansas and give it to another country? In the midst of our self-congratulatory moment in the burning sun (or in my case, rain), do we not see how in fact backasswards our nation is?
Women, black people: if you do not know that you have arrived, and yes, I am thoroughly and willingly throwing myself under the large ass tractor trailer headed my way, but OH MY GOD: it is your own damn fault. Title 9? The Civil Rights Act? Nothing has been made perfect for damn sure, but things could be a helluva lot worse.
While laws do not make perfect the acts of man (or The Man), they give credibility to our complaints. They give us leeway and access and cause. But there are those who walk amongst us, most of the time right damn beside us, who do not have any legal foot or even toe to stand on.
How can I as a woman, as a feminist (there: I said it), raise daughters and a son in a supposedly equal opportunity world when others (and maybe even them) (who knows?) are denied the rights we take so perfectly for granted? Explain to me how I can explain the "civil" in civil rights or the "equal" in equality when that is not in fact true for everyone?
This is not about religion or a bible or any of that. This is not about your private feelings about homosexuality. This is about equal rights under the law. Marriage is not about God or romance at the end of the day (unless you choose it to be so, and dude, I hope most of you do), but about protection. Marriage is about protecting property and children. It is a legal construct. Nothing more, nothing less. Our constitution insists on equal protection under the law. In banning the rights of marriage to some citizens, we are denying the rights granted to all of us to some of us.
And that, fundamentally, is wrong.
The New America we supposedly woke up in is the Old America to gay and lesbian people across this nation. I can not pat myself on the back for anything (even though I live in Massachusetts) (where by the way decriminalizing small amounts of pot won overwhelmingly) (and will save a lot of lives, in my humble non-smoking pot opinion) because our country, our freedom loving, New American country has serious work to do.
And that concludes Ms. Picket's rant. Pick it up if you can.
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PSSST: You may have seen this from Keith O, who I generally consider to be over dramatic for my liking, but still: have at it.
24commentsBrilliant Person Wrote...
Woohoooo!!! 1st comment prize! Keith actually chokes up at the end of this rant, idn't it great?
*sigh* ... what's to say? I agree with you my dear lovely. Even John Stewart the other night said something about the African Americans in California voting YES on Prop. 8 ... something to the effect of, "Ah yes, the oppressEE becomes the oppressOR! Isn't that interesting?" So so sad.
Tragically, people in this country don't vote or "fight" for others because it's right. They fight for others because it starts a/effecting them. White bigoted assholes in this place didn't vote Obama because they give two fucking shits about civil rights and givin' the black man a leg up. They voted for him out of fear of Palin, their sinking mortgage and McCain's war policies. None of this was about civil rights. This was about the other option sucking total fucking colon.
So yeah .... although we want to think people "have seen the light" ... we haven't really. We just didn't like the other option (Obvi, the "we" here doesn't actually include me). So once issues like gay marriage "threaten" our homes, everyone sticks out their chest feathers, does what needs to be done about protecting their own homes, even if that means continuing to disenfranchise millions of other people.
I know I am sounding so cynical but it's true. People go on and on and on about California being the left coast. NO IT'S FUCKING NOT!! Three very populous cities are left-leaning. The rest of the state is full of militia-belonging, ass-backwards, fucking rednecks who think the gays are out to "teach" homosexuality.
Uuuuugggggghhhhhhhhh
Yes, Americans will always step on someone else to get to the top. And once "WE'VE" got our rights, why do we need to worry about the other guy?
Voting rights? Interracial marriage? Integrated Schools? Same fucking struggle, different sexuality.
This so very seriously could turn into a novel, but since I just wrote a novel on someone elses blog about racism and how I am slowly changing my racist father into a man with more understanding, knowledge and above all, compassion.
I fear I will never be able to break the barriers that so many people I know and love have put up to the discussion of equality to every man-woman, man-man, woman-woman relationship. And it drives me ape shit bonkers. My favorite cousin for instance - my very own family will love him with all of their might - at least when he is around, and then in disgust will conspire to "change him" behind his back. For years I have told them "if you can do it behind his back, you can do it to his face". I want him to find that right person and for Godsakes marry - have a family - live the life he wants to live. But I think he avoids relationships for fear that he will have to bring that person to his family. And it breaks my heart.
I wish that the old coke commercial from the 70's could be replayed over and over and over like one of those subliminal public service announcements so maybe some thoughts of kindness, a little piece of understanding, and a whole lot of acceptance and smother out the inequality that we are so sadly engulfed in.
And now I end my rant before it becomes a novel.
I CAN'T UNDERSTAND THIS! Who cares if gay people marry. How does it harm anyone??? Boo.
I feel the same way you do. Before the excitement over Obama's election wore off I began to get angry about these ballot measures. When is this going to stop!
I'm going to piss people off in a minute, so let me open with total agreement. We can't legislate how people feel, but we can legislate equality.
The very fact that a ballot measure on whether or not certain American citizens should or shouldn't get the same Civil Rights as everyone else, made it to a vote disgusts me.
Who cares how people feel about gays? We can't change all their minds, but we sure should be able to keep their feelings out of legislation. Equal rights means EQUAL for everyone.
Now the piss off part. I love how people who would NEVER dream of making a generalization about a minority group ("All blacks are crooks." "All gay men are florists." etc.), have no problem making sweeping generalizations about white America, even though they are a part of it.
"White people only voted because _____." Wait, did I miss a whitey meeting? Did we take a vote on who would speak for all of us?
"Americans have always ______." Again, wait a sec. Whomever did ____ historically is no longer here, and I think the political division in this country should indicate that "Americans" don't ALL agree about ANYTHING.
Sweeping statements about minorities shouldn't be tolerated, because they're bullshit. No one characteristic describes an entire group of people. How 'bout we also stop tolerating "hasty generalizations" about ALL of us?
It's the same thinking that has me shaking my head every time someone tells me how GREAT it is that I take care of the kids on weekends when my wife works...*gasp* all by myself.
As though the fact that a MAN could actually keep two children alive, while keeping the house from burning down, is some kind of miracle...because, you know, we are all drunken, women-chasing assholes, who can't even feed themselves without take-out.
Funny, I work, I take care of the kids, cook 3/4 nights a week, and sometimes clean. If I danced and dressed well, at least all those people could figure I was a still-closeted homosexual.
Thank you. Just thank you. I am still too mad to talk about this without pulling a Joe Scarborough and dropping the F-bomb all over the place. Prop 2, Prop 8 and Prop 102 didn't protect MY marriage, they devalued it. I don't even want to use the word anymore because I hate that they turned it into their own special little club. What's so special about having different genitals from your partner? I liked it better when love and commitment were the requirements.
I do love a good Ms. Picket rant. I've always been amazed at the capacity of people to fight not FOR something but AGAINST something that has no bearing on their life. It smacks of judgement. Unjustified judgement.
#1 Don't talk smack about my boyfriend Keith...:)
#2 MY THOUGHTS EXACLTLY
Um... pretty much everything you said? Ditto.
(that was so much easier than coming up with a rant of my own...)
Amen, sistah!!!!!
When I grow up, I want to be you. Your cool as hell and wicked smaht too!
Jeez. Noone picketed or had a Vote-y type thing when I got married. They just threw Bird Food at me. And that's Not the same thing at all.
I feel sorta Gyped.
I love it when you get all Rant-y.
Rant away! And yeah to what everybody else has said.
I didn't mean to leave an anonymous comment - I'm proud to be me, gayness and all!
I'm at such a loss on this whole topic because I can't for the life of me see why anyone would deny people anything based on who they sleep with. It's just completely foreign to me as a concept. I don't even know what to say.
Plain and simply, agreed.
Sing it, Ms P.
And, please enjoy the victories along the way.
A dear friend commented on my blog, welcoming me home to New America following my trip overseas.
He's been living and working (AIDS education and outreach)in the queer community in the Twin Cities for a long time. He took time off to GOTV in the days prior to the election and has some amazing pro-Obama stories to tell. I figure if he can celebrate, I can too.
I am no less outraged about the ongoing battle for equal rights for all, but I am savoring the victories along the way.
Two women were married yesterday at 9:30 a.m. in my hometown, ushering in a new era in Connecticut.
We will see equal rights in our lifetime. I promise.
Oh Ms P, I do sooooo lurve when you rant!
I DO NOT GET the kerfuffle over gay marriage. Do. Not. Get.
Who CARES if a man marries a man or a woman marries a woman? How, exactly, is this harming ANYONE? How does it affect my marriage? It doesn't. It doesn't take anything away from hetero marriages, it doesn't take anything away from anyone. It just allows two people, who love each other, to have the same rights (and headaches) that heterosexual couple have. That's all. That's ALL.
I'm still so angry about that stupid fucking bill passing that I just want to spit. Or vomit. It disgusts me that people VOTED to take away rights. Completely and utterly disgusts me.
As always, it's a pleasure to read your rants and also those of these commentors. Ditto. I'd add to the argument that our current system of allowing lobbyists to influence legislation is also a threat to our equal rights.
Can you please teach me to rant like you do? Angry but smart. Level-headed and fair but full of piss. I love it.
You are, as my grandma said, piss and vinegar. And I love it.
I mean I love your post. Not piss and vinegar, cause that's just gross.
Equal rights as a US Citizen is only a start. The bigger issue is social reform: getting rid of racism, sexism, and gay discrimination. Racism and sexism have come a long way during our lifetime, but still have a long ways to go in many parts of the country. Discrimination against gays and homophobic attitudes have barely changed. It isn’t just the poorly educated. It is everywhere. Until no one cares if someone is gay or not, you will not see social change. Political reform can make a big difference but the big change will happen with how our children and our children’s children are raised. A woman who runs the biggest technology conference in world for technology start-ups said:
Bus Boycott=1955...1st Black Pres=2008.
Stonewall Riots=1969...Marriage Equality=2022. Our time will come.
Sad if that date is accurate. She doesn’t predict the first gay president.
Sadly I still hear racial comments from people everywhere in the country even the more affluent suburban towns. This is a huge step towards social reform in America and hopefully brings about the last stage in social reform regarding race and opens people eyes to other discrimination. It is worth celebrating even with other parts of the country living in another era. Not sure about his plans for the economy but that us a different matter.
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