I am going to take guitar lessons.
That's right dudes: mama's got a brand new bag. And she will carry it over her shoulder and look so stinkin' cool walking down the street that it won't matter that she can't play a lick or sing for the life of her. Or that she really has no reason to carry that axe around (since hopefully the lessons will be in her home) but whatever.
I am giving myself a solid year to learn one tune, because I am a low-bar-setter after all, and also because the last time I played, it was 8th grade and I think I learned maybe two chords of some heinous Rust song and so quit early on and never became the Joni Picket I imagined myself to be. He just didn't understand me, that instructor, so I will set set the bar low and find some teacher who can teach me only Neil Young songs and maybe some Faces thrown in there too.
And I will practice (this time), because I am not a knitter or a crocheter or a cleaner or a cooker so god knows, I have the time and no excuses. I am an excellent game player on my Iphone but that's not quite a hobby now, is it?
Plus Rory wants to learn so I am already picturing our duets at family parties and the Iron Horse and Carnegie Hall. Trouble is, she is seven and her speaking voice is a cross between a high-pitched princess and the frog the princess kissed who smoked fifty cigarettes, and mine is...worse. But she can already play the start to Smoke on the Water on her own little guitar so there's hope!
And a girl's gotta dream! Right? And also, I think this is much more responsible than me fulfilling the other one I deferred: which is to skateboard. I am pretty sure it's impossible to break an elbow or tear an ACL with a guitar, so instead, this is the year I sling more than commands and mac & cheese. This is the year I rock. Or folk. Or (sigh) get all adult contemporary.
Or like this -- please.
18commentsBrilliant Person Wrote...
Well actually you could break something....walking down the street with that thing slung over your shoulder...you could be NOT watching where your going..daydreaming of your chance of auditioning on American Idol, trip over your own feet, and break your arm....
We got our daughter a guitar for Christmas and are looking for a good place for her to take lessons. Maybe she could join your band?
This is why you are my "Internet Idol"!
Joni Picket, you go girl!
There really are lots of ways to hurt yourself with a guitar.
I am sure that you'll be fine though. I do have a tip from my family to yours: the acoustics are best in the bathroom.
Good luck with that. I hurt myself with a guitar while taking lessons in Britain. Riding my bike with he guitar strapped on my back. I cycled beneath a low hanging limb. I ducked my head, but the guitar didn't duck. It was kind of embarrassing.
Bring the thunder, woman! That is awesome, and I'm going to confess to being a wee bit jealous. I can't even read music, though, so I look at my lack of any musical talent as a gift to the world.
(btw - your insanely nice email to me? Thank you...seriously. It made me blush, and I've saved it for when I need a little kick!)
That is awesome. And the guitar edged out the skateboard? Man, your kids have to think that's just the coolest thing in the world.
I decided I was going to learn a foreign language once and for all and have been studying privately two hours a week and I'm loving it. Do it. Go for it.
I really hope you'll be wearing one of those spectacular Hee Haw outfits when you play. Because, you know... it makes you better.
Rock on with your badself, Ms. P.
You go girl. I always wanted to learn to play and even took lessons for 6 weeks once (commitment!) but you have to cut your fingernails and frankly there are just some sacrifices I'm not willing to make. But I'll totally be your roadie.
You will rock Ms. P! Slowly and with carefully timed chord progressions. And probably a pained look on your face as you concentrate. But you WILL ROCK!
I too am learning the guitar this year. Maybe we can start an all girl band?
And I too want to learn to ride a skateboard and a surfboard. Oh you didn't say surf board did you??? Whatever, I bet you want to be a surfer chick too.
Wait a minute. You mean to tell me all I'm missing to look cool is a guitar on my back?
Smoke On The Water! Waving my internet lighter, (or is it the cell phone now)?
Figured Ms P already played guitar!!!
I'll teach you some Neil songs & next year we'll do this one at the PTO Auction!
http://www.icompositions.com/music/song.php?sid=55303
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