Is it cheating to google "polygon"? I mean to say, is it cheating if I google "polygon" and then pretend to know the answer?
Math makes me sweat. Spelling I can manage. Reading I can do. Math gives me heart palpitations.
Also, why do I seem to be the only one not taking notes at school open houses? Am I supposed to be taking notes? I snuck a few peeks to see what my note-writing neighbors were writing but I got side-tracked by the image of grown adults perched 15 inches off the ground in tiny seats hunched over tiny desks. It was so cute really and I started to day-dream a little: was the guy in the suit the class clown in 4th grade? Which one of these grown-ups stared out the window most of the day or drew little hearts on the edges of the pages? At which point I drew little stars on the edges of the information packet in front of me. And then I actually took some notes: peer pressure's a bitch.
The 4th grade teacher is a whip smart ball of awesomeness only made more awesome when she encouraged us NOT to correct homework. I generally have not corrected homework anyway, mostly because I think the teacher should see that my child really has no freakin' idea what she's doing sometimes, which sometimes happens to be the case. Still, it's pretty sweet when the teacher tells you to do exactly what you want to do. So, I sat at the counter, well I stood actually, as I was also trying to sort through a massive pile of paper that held somewhere within its mass a couple forms I needed to fill out (damn forms!), and gave some direction, and also some encouragement ("do your homework!"), googled "polygon" on my phone and just casually tossed out the definition to impress my short people and the extra ones hanging out for the day.
And the heart palpitations? At a very low level thank you very much because I honestly I have no idea what a regular polygon is since I really didn't read the part that mentioned there might be different types of polygons and anyhoo, "Just go with what you remember most from school and your awesome teacher will look it over tomorrow because I am NOT SUPPOSED to correct it which is not saying I COULDN'T correct if I WANTED to, but I'm just following the rules, buddy. I took some notes, you see, at the open house -- it's written down right here on this packet, next to the doodles."
It's gonna be a great year.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Homework
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23commentsBrilliant Person Wrote...
The BEST part about to back-to-school night in middle and high schools(other than driving home when it's over), is fitting at the desks.
And you think you sweat with "polygon"? We're back in god-forsaken GEOMETRY at my house. Oy vey!
Oh God, we're twins separated at birth. I hate Math. I stink at Math and I cannot for the life of me focus on Math. Me and Math, like Palin and foreign policy.
Do what I do... act like you know the answer but then pretend like you are using Google search to teach her a lesson in how to "research" the answer on her own.
Gah homework is so stupid. I would love to get it outlawed in the state.
Maybe we can get the village thing going - I rock at math, you can handle the English part.
I don't want parents to do the homework with their kids! You already passed fourth grade. It doesn't help me if they aren't doing it independently! Sorry. Frustrated educator speaking.
I don't do homework with the kids. I mean, I am close by to see that they're doing it, and I try to help if they have questions about what something means (seriously, thank you, Google, and Middle Aged Woman up there, who pulled me through a HUGE crunch recently!).
Math killed me. It still does. I live for Google to at least get me the definitions!
Ok- this is one of my favorite things I learned when my oldest went to grade school... THE MAGIC NUMBER.
If you take any two numbers that are 2 numbers away from each other and add them, all you have to do is double the "magic" middle number.
9+7 (the magic number is 8, double it and you have 16)
3+5 (magic number is 4, doubled is 8)
11+13 (magic number is 12, doubled is 24)
I don't know why I am fascinated by this, but rest assured that I am.
OH MY GOD, you are SUCH a cheater.
Just kidding. You know I would totally do that if I had kids.
Dude. They totally think you are like God, or Dumbledore or something.
It's awesome.
also, Ms. P, you are fully on my blogroll now because, you know...
math is HARD
and you make me smile hard.
I want to come to your school! Mantha's teacher sort of expects me to correct her homework, you know, so she doesnt have to.
She is in the advanced Strand Math and regular math, so I became numbers illiterate two years ago!
I do not look forward to highschool!!!!
But at least her math teacher doesnt make me stand in a Godforsakenlinefor eternity like her band teacher and that stupid music store sales person!
I've actually done homework FOR my kids. It's a bummer when my essays only get a B-.
Yeah, I don't get the note takers either. I am actually a little envious of them, thinking, they have found something important enough to write down and it's taking everything I have not to txt someone just to relieve the boredom. Two kids, 15 months apart, i pretty much get it now.
I was the teacher at back to school night tonight. There were some note-takers, some overgrown class clowns, some helpless brown-nosers, some window gazers, some texters, and some apparent asleep asses from the small chairs. They were all there...
I find those Open Houses pass a lot faster if I have a buzz on. I take notes but they're usually about the busy-body perfect parents who are there to show me up. Laggin, if I sat down in one of those desks, it would be attached to my ass for the rest of the year or until I could afford surgery to have it removed.
I think one cannot be both literate and mathematically-inclined. ? My ACT scores were like 30 points different between English and math. Math bites.
So what do you think seriously about that anon comment on my page? A Weirdo?
I remember the word polygon from last year but of course, couldn't remember the definition so I went to the parent cheat sheet (although I have googled 2nd and 3rd grade answers many times before)... so I recited the answer to my daughter who, at the moment, was not annoyed that I was correcting her work. When it came to the regular polygons and there was no answer in the parent cheat sheet, I guessed (all equal lengths?)... am I right?
I like Susan's answer
I was flaked out mom at open house. It was like a greeting event. When a little red headed boy was announced "found" in the office, we sent a mission to tell the staff they had a young Daniels on their hands.
You did far better than I!
When I take notes at Open House it is usually my grocery list. I *used* to be one of those teachers wondering which of my many pearls of wisdom the parents were jotting down. Now I know it's: cilantro toilet paper squeeze yogurts crystal light.
And I usually try to bring my "coffee mug" full of Pinot Grigio to these school things. I find this helps me get through the local carnival as well.
psss check over at Liberal Journal to see what I do to blogging bullies.
The post were there are like 15 responses.
Oh my oh my, I feel almost mean.
Let me just say there is a reason I teach KINDERGARTEN math!!!
But don't tell anyone, it can be our little secret.
The older I get the more I realize how far removed from school I'll be when I finally have some kids. Google better still be around! lol
I am grateful so simply make it thru the witching/homework hour at all, never minding checking their work.
Picture a 1 1/2 year old climbing on the table, grabbing the pencils out of the hands of children complaining that homework is "SOOO stupid". It is all relative Ms. P :)
Notatennisskirtmom - You are simply hilarious! I wish we were in the same classroom!
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